OK, I'm having a big party for my 42th. Got the venue and band booked. It's a cool classic venue, and will be byo, with a bar running also. Kick off 8pm. So are thinking of providing a supper later on, as hoping guests will have a feed before they start drinking. Is it too rude to ask on invite to bring a wee dish for supper? (I don't want or expect presents) Or better to leave it off invite, and just verbaly ask close friends to bring something if they can be bothered. I will provide some supper stuff, but would like others to contribute for extra and variety. You know what pissed 40yo's can be like! Or give me options for nice cheap easy filling supper stuff. I'm not loaded. (no oven at venue)
cat286,
Apr 26, 9:12am
How about putting "pot luck supper" on your invite - possibly fit with your retro venue and I don't think people mind contributing.
patsy3,
Apr 26, 9:21am
That's a good option thanks. Pot luck supper. I don't want people to feel obliged, but if they have the time and want to contribute.....
nfh1,
Apr 26, 9:24am
Are the guests supplying their own drinks as well?
If they are then you could put something like - No presents please but would love you to bring a supper plate.
Enjoy your evening.
patsy3,
Apr 26, 9:28am
Yep, would cost me thousands to provide my mates with booze. Will provide a couple of punch options. Straight and alcoholic. Will also give a champ cocktail on arrival.
nfh1,
Apr 26, 9:29am
LOL - do I know you????
jessie981,
Apr 26, 9:44am
I hate 'dos' where guests are asked to bring b.y.o, food & even though invite doesn't say, still have to take a present.
winnie231,
Apr 26, 9:56am
I'm in your age bracket and I'd say go with the 'pot luck supper' or 'supper plate welcome in lieu of pressies' ... At our age people can appreciate the costs involved with hosting a party & most are happy to contribute.
patsy3,
Apr 26, 10:02am
Yes Jessie, that's my dilemma, don't want my guests to feel 'obliged' to bring anything. Went to a wedding recently and loved the invite: "Your presence is our presents", but feel free to shower us with cash and gifts. Mature couple, and it was so appropriate.
Maybe I do leave it off altogether, and if anyone asks what to bring I give them the nod, supper. Might be the option eh?
lizab,
Apr 26, 10:47am
I'd ask your close mates - that's what my crowd would do :) Just have in mind the kind of food you will be able to do yourself and think about what things your friends make that everyone loves and ask them to make those.
nfh1,
Apr 26, 10:49am
Would people ask if they had to bring something if you have a venue organised?I would mention that people can BYO and there is a cash bar otherwise it may come as a shock if they have to buy their own drinks.
I think it is definitely OK to ask for a plate rather than a present - people will probably be delighted at that - so difficult to buy presents for people.
Happy Birthday - a bit early I suppose!
petal-pickle,
Apr 26, 10:57pm
Haha, 42th!!!Would've thought that was your 42nd birthday actually patsy!!
beaker59,
Apr 27, 1:25am
Must be getting long in the 2th :)
elliehen,
Apr 27, 1:51am
Good one :)
I'd be even more specific and say something like: 'No gifts please, but a plate of finger food to share would be appreciated'.
Uncertainty around things is uncomfortable.
lythande1,
Apr 27, 2:58am
No. I don't drink and my friends in my age bracket (40's) drink lightly.
I think it's rude. You book a venue but it's bring your own everything? I wouldn't go. One thing if it's at your place and you say bring stuff but you book a place and a band. Nah.
nzl99,
Apr 27, 3:32am
That's great wording. :-)
lizab,
Apr 27, 4:39am
My friend booked a hall for her 40th, booked the DJ and asked her close friends to bring something for the supper (she'd done lots of food herself also) No problem - everyone had a great night!!
rkcroft,
Apr 27, 6:43am
Oh get over yourself.With an attitude like that, I dare say no one would invite you anyway.
patsy3,
Apr 27, 6:55am
Don't ya hate being a winter baby. Can never have a casual BBQ, or a Marquee on the lawn, as the weather will be crap. Thanks for all the comments and suggestions. Will be great, awesome venue, I have always thrown a good bash, and those that will want to, will come. Yeah Haa.
jenner4,
Apr 27, 8:49am
elliehen wrote:
Good one :)
I'd be even more specific and say something like: 'No gifts please, but a plate of finger food to share would be appreciated'.
Have had a few invites worded this way , love it , why give gifts that people don't need and to be honest you can have a lot of fun making up a plate/tray [ I got a fewvery nice tray from the $2 shop and put the name of the host on the back ] off finger food , club sammysand old fashion fudge cake cut in small squares , asparagus rolls, chicken rolls, its a nice way to show how much you honer some ones friend ship
malcovy,
Apr 28, 1:11am
I would be happy to take a plate to a friends birthday and we all know how much women like to show off with the food they make.
theanimal1,
Apr 28, 3:17am
i have some nibble ideas if you want?
asue,
Apr 28, 9:14pm
Plates of sandwiches and nibbles served continually.Replenish as required. Ask one of your mates to over see this, otherwise it will come to about 11 pm and everyone will have had a belly full of booze and then want to head into town for a feed, and you have paid all that money for a venue etc for only a couple of hours by the time the last lot arrive and first lot leave.It would probably only cost you an xtra couple of hundred bucks to lay on some extras. Enjoy your night.
julie_,
Apr 29, 1:54am
Sounds fun!I wouldn't have a problem bringing a plate & BYO too.In fact I usually take a plate wherever I go (as well as a present where appropriate).I have a big family & pitching in always makes things easier, so I am this way with friends also.I agree that spelling it out is necessary as from experience I have found that some just 'get it' & others really don't even when most would ;)
Have fun!
anne1955,
Apr 29, 4:42am
I am a little old hehe But I would say no presents please but a plate would be appriecated.I remeber going to a 40th that asked that once and as people know me I can't just do one plate..but I love cook and food so that's me I took mine in early in afternoon so people didn't need to see..but almost lost it and many of us still laugh about a couple that came with a mini pizza YES just 1..I couldn't do it..so if there is a way you add food can be brought prior to...wherever it might help then you get an idea of how much is arriving, making a couple or more loaves of sandwich's up the night before having a drink with mates while you do it :) And a few of those frozen susage Rolls and if they don't look like they are needed well don't use or thaw them..things like that with out going over board if people ring and ask tell them..savouries..sandwiches or what ever cold meat platter..just have a pad by phone and it they say great I'll do that write it down..some things you can over do..hope this helps :)Have a great on I remeber mine we had a juvinelle party played parcel the parcel..pin the tale on the donkey etc was a great night...
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