How Can I Repay My Good Friend Who\'s Also

A terrific cook? She makes the most divine dinner parties and her ordinary cooking is perfect and always looks good as well. When my mother died suddenly, she was first at the door loaded with flowers and the makings of an entire meal. It was her 'proper' food which we looked forward to instead of the rich baking.

Now it's her turn to be receiving from me, but I'm a hopeless cook.

What can I bring that will contribute to a family meal tomorrow or the next day? It needs to be tasty when no one feels like eating and when I don't know how many will be there. I would rather do something substantial like a meat or vege dish than more pies and muffins. I am prepared to follow a recipe to the letter to get this right for her.

Thanks for any help.

Donnabeth, if you're not confident about your cooking ability, how about putting together a basket ( or tray/platter ) of things like cheeses, crackers, fresh and dried fruits, olives, salami and perhaps wine or special cordials or whatever else you think she and her family might like and find useful ?

OXTAIL STEW
INGREDIENTS
Oxtails (as Many as you think you need)
Guinness or Cheap Red Wine (Shiraz is best)
1 lge Onion
1 Stalk of Celery
½ Red Capsicum
8 – 10 Mushrooms
Fresh Ginger
Salt and, if you want, Pepper
(The following are optional – Use as much or as little as you think you want)
Garlic
Chilli
Dried Mixed Herbs or fresh Oregano and Thyme
Note: - The meat is the focus of this dish. Do not put a whole lot of vegetables in it. They are best cooked separately and served as accompaniments (but for your friend I have made a slight variation)
METHOD
Note: Cook this the day before.
Note: There are several methods of cooking this stew. Take your pick.
1. Carefully brown your oxtails in the pot you will eventually cook the stew in (if cooking on the stove) over a medium heat in batches, making sure you do the sides. This part takes a while. Don’t rush it. (I usually do other things at the same time like knead bread or wash, peel and thickly slice up your chosen vegetables)
2. Remove each browned oxtail as it is finished till all are done. When you are down to your last few and room is freed up in the pot start browning the mushrooms and onions as well. Once all the meat is removed add in the rest of the vegetables which you will have cut into chunks
3. Once they look nicely sautéed take them out of the pot and deglaze with either 1 cup of the Red Wine or a tin of Guinness
4. Put the oxtails back into the pot (if cooking on the stove) or into the crock or casserole dish, in layers, salting each layer as you go. Sprinkle with the herbs. Add the deglazed liquid if not cooking in the pot otherwise leave liquid in the pot.
5.Put the vegetables on top.
6. Check that you have enough liquid (if I was using my Dinerite then that would be enough liquid). It will also be enough liquid if using a crock pot. If you are using a regular pot then add a bit more water to just about cover the meat. If you decide to casserole it then I think that will be enough liquid but do check halfway through the cooking process.
7. Crock Pot – 8-10 hours at low setting. Casserole – 4-5 hours at 160oC, Dinerite – 2-2½ hrs on lowest heatafter lid whistles and you close it off (electric element) or with gas use a simmer mat. Regular Pot – 3-4 hours after bringing it to the boil then turning down to lowest setting (once again use a simmer mat on the lowest setting if cooking with gas and check liquid level every hour). Pressure Cooker – Haven’t a clue.
8. Once the meat has reached the desired state of tenderness remove from the heat and drain all the liquid into another bowl or jug. Cool meat and stock separately then refrigerate.
9. Next day or so prepare the rest of the meal.
a. Remove the, by now, solidified fat from the top of the stock and put the stock into a pot andreheat. (Put the solidified fat into a clean yoghurt container and save in the fridge till rubbish day and throw it away or, you can use it to cook other things).
b. Prepare some vegetables - chunk up a carrot or two, ¼ a potato or two and some small pickling onions.
c.Put some extra wine/Guinness/water into the pot with the stock if necessary and add the vegetables and cook till veges are semi-cooked.
11.In another smaller pot add a knob of butter. When it has melted add a tablespoon of flour and mix together. Be careful not to let this mixture get too hot or the gluten will be destroyed and your sauce won’t thicken.
12. Add the cooking liquid from your vegetables, 1/3rd at a time, whisking with a whisk till thick with each addition. You should end up with a gravy type consistency. Taste and season as necessary.
13. Put the sauce and the semi-cooked vegetables in with the meat.
14. Buy some fresh beans or asparagus to go with the stew and deliver.
15. Instruct you friend to reheat the stew gently (she'll know what to do) and cook the greens how she likes best.

lol .....glad its not me.

What about roasting a leg of lamb, and making a lovely salad and some new potatoes or glazing a large ham?

Nothing wrong with the recipe.....buzzy.... I am not sure what the favour is for.I would not like to be offered bones to chew on, if it was a funeral though. My family would eat out on that for years. .

What a lovely idea l am sure your friend will love you taking the time to do something for them in their time of need
What a great friend you are
How about a casserole l am sure someone here has a great recipe they will post for you

when we lost my uncle and he was a big business person in a family firm. we got everything from flowers, baskets of flowers, cakes, puddings, cassaroles, buscuits, slices, a big platter (sent from Auckland from a company where all the directors/managers families did a home baking selection for memory what was on it was truffles, chocolate brownie, some apricot slice, fudge etc it was lovely as it had little cards stuck on it with a message from each family. It was really what touched our hearts at that point and it was given to us by the courier company all wrapped up in cellophane.

I second that! I think mushrooms are great in cassaroles.

"I would rather do something substantial like a meat or vege dish than more pies and muffins."

Thanks for your vote of no-confidence pickles. Now what part of the above extract from her original post didn't you understand?

Poster #1. The recipe will do equally well with any other cut of meat. It doesn't have to be oxtail, however, this particular dish is a firm favourite and well loved in our family.

Also poster #1. I'm sorry I bothered now. Go and make your truffles and brownies, etc wrapped in cellophane or tacky bacon and egg pie and I'll butt out.

Also poster #1. I'm sorry I bothered now. Go and make your truffles and brownies, etc wrapped in cellophane or tacky bacon and egg pie and I'll butt out.[/quote]

The original poster has not even responded yet?, what planet are you on nutter

Not confident is a nice way of saying I'm totally hopeless. I want to do well, but somehow I always end up with a mess. I can make endless lists of desserts, but know from experience that they will be getting sick of sweet and greasy. We only sat at the table as a family twice in five days and well appreciated being able to reheat a 'proper' meal.

I like the idea of a roast leg of lamb. Even I can roast meat. I make good bread, so a nice homemade savoury bread and fresh salad ingredients sound good to go with the meat. The roast has the advantage of being able to be used hot or cold, especially if there is a jug of gravy with it.

Thanks for your suggestion, Buzzy,and the effort you went to write your recipe in great detail. It might be best try your oxtail recipe at home before I chance taking it anywhere else. Oxtails are expensive here which is why I've never tried cooking them.

WOW!!!

your savoury bread, a leg of lamb and salad, sounds perfect. You are a fab friend

what about taking a nice carrot salad its easy peasy to make and only requires carrots, a small tin of tomato soup some pumpkin seeds, and vinegar ill look up the recipe if yoiur interested it keeps for a week in fridge and taste divine

here you go, 1 kg of carrots sliced into match sticks, 1 small tin of tomato soup, 3/4 cup of malt vinegar, 1 onion cut into rings, 1 cup of sugar, 1/2 cup of oil, 1 T worchester sauce 1 green pepper & pumpkin seeds (optional), slice carrots and blanch only, in a seperate pan heat sugar soup vinegar oil & sauce just until sugar is disolved, then pour sauce over carrots and sprinkle seeds over top

Sometimes in times of trouble you get mass's of food when all you need is a friend, go and say hi and have a chat during which you can discreetly find what is needed. This can be as simple as cleaning everyones shoes for the funeral. Washing the cars or tidying up the garden and decks for visitors(always heaps of those) someone turned up and did all those things when Mum died. The neighbours also turned up and cleaned and tidied up after and also helped serve and kitchen duties for Dads wake.

You don't specify your friends trouble but sometimes too a very good cook uses cooking as therapy might be a shame to deny her that.

Often people ask if they can help, take advantage as you do two parties a favour you as the recipient and also the giver often gets the biggest buzz. Mum lived in a retirement village when she died we had allot of family in town and no one had much time to cook so I grabbed a huge piece of corned beef and took it to the lady next door. She had it perfectly cooked for us when we got back that evening so all we had to do was boil a few spuds and make a salad. She beamed for days as she had been able to help in a practical way and we made a new friend.

beaker59, I agree that people are very happy to have their open offers of help accepted. I asked a friend to make some sandwiches; not only did she make them but roped in a workmate to help serve and clean up.

I'd been meaning to tidy the pots at my front door for weeks, but "never had the time". I came home to find the pots full of bright flowers. Someone knew I'd fret about people seeing the mess at my door and made it pretty because this time I genuinely didn't have the time.

The CHCH quake and the Southland snows have shown everyone how kindhearted and helpful friends, relatives, neighbours and strangers are to each other in times of crisis.

onnabeth, if you can produce a roast and also " make good bread " you are certainly not a " hopeless cook ". I'm sure your friend will appreciate whatever you give her.

I think an apology is called for buzzy110!! poster #1 has said NOTHING about your contribution, was there a need to be so cutting and rude?

Donnabeth, just because you are not as confident as your friend in the cooking department, please dont be put off. i am sure she would appreciate any contribution you could make. You could make some lovely fresh bread or bread rolls or do the roast for her, served nice and hot and ready to eat. Lasagne is also another great thing to make, as she can heat and eat or pop it in the freezer till later.

You never miss a chance to put the boot in do you!

Do you really think Buzzy's response was normal???- how bizarre

It is not about "putting the boot in" as you call it beaker ( which, by the way is a bit rich) it seems to be the norm. I dont think what was said was called for,simple.

Smoked Fish and Curry Pie ( very tasty and makes a large one )

100g butter
4 tomatoes diced
2 large onions diced
1 cup mixed vegetables
1 tsp curry powder
salt and pepper to taste
2 dessertsp lemon pepper seasoning
1 cup flour
1.5 litres milk
1x310g tin smoked fish drained and mashed
6 hard boiled eggs
4 cups mashed potato
1 cup grated cheese
chopped parsley
Serves 8-10
Melt butter in large pan and saute diced tomatoes, onions and mixed vegetables. Add curry powder, salt, pepper, and lemon pepper seasoning and stir. After about 5 mins add flour then gradually mix in the milk, stirring all the time till it comes to the boil. Add drained and mashed fish, and chopped hard boiled eggs. Put in a large baking dish and spoon or pipe mashed potato over the top. Sprinkle with grated cheese and chopped parsley. Cook 180degC for 45mins. Serve with crusty bread and green salad.