Do you have feelings of inadequacy? Do you suffer from shyness? Do you sometimes wish you were more assertive? If you answered yes to any of these questions, ask your doctor or pharmacist about Sauvignon Blanc.
Sauvignon Blanc is the safe, natural way to feel better and more confident about yourself and your actions. It can help ease you out of your shyness and let you tell the world that you're ready and willing to do just about anything.
You will notice the benefits of Sauvignon Blanc almost immediately and, with a regime of regular doses, you can overcome any obstacles that prevent you from living the life you want to live. Shyness and awkwardness will be a thing of the past and you will discover many talents you never knew you had.
Stop hiding and start living.
Sauvignon Blanc may not be right for everyone. Women who are pregnant or nursing should not use it. However, women who wouldn't mind nursing or becoming pregnant are encouraged to try it.
Side effects may include:
dizziness nausea vomiting incarceration erotic lustfulness loss of motor control loss of clothing loss of money loss of virginity delusions of grandeur table dancing headache dehydration dry mouth and a desire to sing Karaoke and play all-night rounds of Strip Poker, Truth Or Dare, and Naked Twister
WARNINGS: * The consumption of Sauvignon Blanc may make you think you are whispering when you are not. * The consumption of Sauvignon Blanc may cause you to tell your friends over and over again that you love them. * The consumption of Sauvignon Blanc may cause you to think you can sing. * The consumption of Sauvignon Blanc may make you think you can converse enthusiastically with members of the opposite sex without spitting. * The consumption of Sauvignon Blanc may create the illusion that you are tougher, smarter, faster and better looking than most people. Please feel free to share this important information with as many women as you feel may benefit!
vintagekitty,
Aug 5, 1:10am
lol, love it!
darlingmole,
Aug 5, 3:15am
haha~! I'll be getting some soon ... sounds like the perfect "tonic"!
goodbooks,
Aug 5, 9:43am
Mmmmm - usually medicines taste yick!
elliehen,
Aug 5, 9:58am
Hope none of the girls in your campervan suffered from any of those serious side effects ;)
winnie231,
Aug 5, 10:26am
I've found a 'tonic' with similar effects ... it's called Pinot Noir!
kob,
Aug 5, 6:01pm
For his birthday, little Joseph asked for a 10-speed bicycle. His father said, 'Son, we'd give you one, but the mortgage on this house is $280, 000 and your mother just lost her job. . There's no way we can affordit 'The next day the father saw little Joseph heading out the front door with a suitcase. So he asked, 'Son, where are you going? ' Little Joseph told him... ... . . 'I was walking past your room last night and heard youtelling mom you were pulling out. Then I heard her tell you to wait because she was coming too. And I'll be damned if I'm staying here by myself with a$280, 000 mortgage and no bloody bike
kob,
Aug 5, 9:16pm
not meant to offend anyone either just abit of fun
winnie231,
Aug 5, 9:34pm
Good one kob
cap,
Aug 5, 10:08pm
LMAO to both - cheers for that!
vintagekitty,
Aug 5, 10:36pm
lol elliehen- practice makes perfect!
vintagekitty,
Aug 5, 10:36pm
! ! ! ! ! !
kob,
Aug 6, 8:15pm
I was in a hardware store the other day pushing my cart around when I
collided with a young guy pushing his cart. I said to the young guy, "Sorry about that. I'm looking for my wife and I guess I wasn't paying attention to where I was going. " The young guy says, "That's OK. It's a coincidence. . I'm looking for my wife, too. I can't find her and I'm getting a little desperate. I said, "Well, maybe we can help each other. . What does your wife look like? " The young guy says, "Well, she is 24 years old, tall, with blond hair, big blue eyes, long legs, big boobs, and she's wearing tight white shorts, a halter top and no bra. What does your wife look like? " ... ... ... ... ... ... I said, "Doesn't matter --- let's look for yours. "
winnie231,
Aug 6, 8:38pm
I just spilt my tea down my front from laughing! ! ! Thanks Kob!
darlingmole,
Aug 6, 8:38pm
haha~! dunno where you get them kob but gee they're funny~!
toeblister,
Aug 6, 8:44pm
Thanks for a great laugh to start the day! Nearly wet me pants laughing :)
darlingmole,
Aug 6, 8:54pm
A doctor examining a woman who had been rushed to the Emergency Room, tookthe husband aside, and said, 'I don't like the looks of your wife at all... '
'Me neither doc, ' said the husband. 'But she's a great cook and really goodwith the kids. '
darlingmole,
Aug 6, 8:56pm
While shopping for vacation clothes, my husband and I passed a display ofbathing suits. It had been at least ten years and twenty pounds since I hadeven considered buying a bathing suit, so sought my husband's advice. 'What do you think? ' I asked. 'Should I get a bikini or an all-in-one? ' 'Better get a bikini, ' he replied. 'You'd never get it all in one. ' He's still in intensive care.
winnie231,
Aug 6, 8:57pm
The day just keeps getting better!
kob,
Aug 6, 9:46pm
sweet giggling myself
white_elephant,
Aug 6, 10:38pm
Good way to start my day, thanks
dyles,
Aug 6, 10:55pm
The husband had just finished reading a new book entitled, YOU CAN BE THE MAN OF YOUR HOUSE.
He stormed to his wife in the kitchen and announced, 'From now on, you need to know that I am the man of this house and my word is LAW.
You will prepare me a gourmet meal tonight, and when I'm finished eating my meal, you will serve me a sumptuous dessert. Afterwards, you are going to draw me aso I can relax.
You will wash my back and towel me dry and bring me my robe... Then, you will massage my feet and hands.
Then tomorrow, guess who's going to dress me and do my hair? ' Without even looking up from her morning paper the wife replied, 'The frickin' funeral director would be my first guess.
helen65018,
Aug 7, 12:32am
Love it!
mountian,
Jan 2, 2:40pm
oh dyles~! I LOVE it haha
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